How Men Make Friends: Projects Plus Power Tools --- In a growing movement, guys are gathering at sheds to build things

"Men's Sheds are where guys get together and build things, or watch others build things, and become friends in the process.

"It's like when you put together a piece of IKEA furniture," saysPhilJohnson, who started a Men's Shed in Hopkins, Minn. One person uses a tool. Two others hold pieces in place. Three argue about directions and everyone else sits around, criticizing what they're doing, he says.

"We're just doing something together and we become friends," says Mr. Johnson, a retired IT project manager and director emeritus of the U.S. Men's Shed Association.

The Hopkins shed is one of 27 Men's Sheds in the U.S., where men, and sometimes women, gather to build park benches, desks, and bird feeders, or learn to cook and sew. At David's Memorial Men's Shed in Girard, Pa., a 5,000-square-foot pole barn, members work on cars or learn to weld. Shedders, as they are called in Ruston, La., construct bunk beds for shelters in a former warehouse. Elsewhere, shedders repair bikes for police youth leagues and clean parks.

All share the motto "Shoulder to Shoulder," the premise being that men bond while working side by side, as opposed to women, who form friendships "Face to Face," by talking to each other.

The Men's Shed movement started in Australia in the 1990s, to combat loneliness among retired men, and has grown to more than 2,500 sheds in a dozen countries, each with projects based on local interests. Estonia has two sheds, whose members help each other with chores, such as stacking logs and transporting stones.

Ireland, believed to have the most sheds per capita, holds annual Sheddies awards, with a luncheon to honor men who complete a 10-week "Sheds for Life" health-awareness program. In Australia, which has more than 1,200 sheds, the host of the Men's Shed podcast wrote a jingle with a refrain "There's a helping hand in the Men's Shed." Buses and a disused mortuary act as shed meeting places in some countries.

The concept has been slower to catch on in the U.S. "As Americans, we are distracted a lot," says Mark Winston, a founder and director of the U.S. Men's Shed Association, who estimates there are about 1,350members. "There are a million things competing for our attention. In Ireland, when a shed opens, everyone knows about it."That is changing, he says, because more people recognize the importance of community in fighting isolation, which can lead to depression. Sheds bring them together.

There's no pressure to bond. "Guys can work on a whole project and never say a word. They connect by working together," says Allen Hawthorne, who started David's Memorial shed in honor of his son, who helped build the garage where the shed operates.His son's picture hangs on the wall.

The Ruston Community Men's Shed in Louisiana was founded by the late Beulah Laster, a local businesswoman who heard about the movement and thought it would be good for both local men and women. One part of the shed is filled with sanders and saws, and another with sewing machines and paint. Members move between the two sides, says Tommy Folk, shed leader, who says about half of the 100 members are men and about half are under 65.

Shop foreman Rhea DeOliviera, who retired from a local hardware store, is the only paid staffer, working 22 hours a week. Members know each other, he says, and if a regular doesn't show up, another calls to check. When his father recently passed away, other shed members came early to open the doors and tend to supplies and tools. "It was a big relief not to have to worry about it," he says.

Dean Kirby and John Payne are regulars. In the course of building tables and benches, they have built an unexpected friendship. "I probably would not have met or related to him because we come from such different backgrounds and cultures," says Dr. Kirby, a retired physician, of his friend Mr. Payne, who was in the military and taught ROTC at a local college. Dr. Kirby says he joined the shed because he loves woodworking, but didn't have a home workshop. He has become the shed photographer, documenting the progress of porch swings, wooden bowls and a workbench for wounded veterans, and posting them on Facebook along with photos of donated lumber. He helps teach "Tool-torials" on power tools for newcomers. "We have an excellent safety record with little more than a small splinter or knuckle abrasion over the past five years," he says.

Mr. Payne, who retired from the military, saw a flier about the Men's Shed at the Veterans Affairs office. "I wanted to be around people my own age and learn things," says Mr. Payne, who wanted more skills to fix things at home. The shed is 7 minutes from his house.

He comes four days a week, often seeing Dr. Kirby there. They consult on projects and exchange stories over coffee.

"He asks about my children. I ask about his. We laugh together," says Mr. Payne. "He's so precise. Not me. I tell him he's slowing me down."

Both men say they have church friends and neighbor friends, but that their lives are richer with each other in them. "It has been a joy knowing him," says Dr. Kirby. "I would be less without him."" [1]

1. How Men Make Friends: Projects Plus Power Tools --- In a growing movement, guys are gathering at sheds to build things
Ansberry, Clare.  Wall Street Journal, Eastern edition; New York, N.Y. [New York, N.Y]. 21 Apr 2023: A.1.